Self acceptance

 

Self-acceptance

Accept yourself as you are

     The individual often feels self-rejection and dissatisfaction with himself, as a result of his constant discovery of his personal flaws, especially since some of them can be corrected and some cannot be corrected, and some of the characters are easy to develop and some are difficult. Whoever does not accept himself as he is, with its advantages and disadvantages, will not be able to To accept the other person as he (she) is, just as he or she may not be able to develop his personality for the better.

No personality is devoid of flaws, but the word “flaws” is largely relative, so that what one person sees as a flaw another may see as an advantage, and this discrepancy may occur as a result of the person’s need to acquire a characteristic that others may call a “flaw,” or as a result of his suffering from “ A defect that others may call a desirable quality. A wife who suffers from her husband being hesitant in making decisions and not being specific about what he wants may admire a man who is reckless or hasty in making his decisions.

Discover your flaws:

     A person realizes his faults whenever he feels that others do not like his character. Especially if more than one person in more than one situation expresses that they are harmed by his style in dealing with them. In fact, an individual cannot develop his character or correct his faults and negatives unless he feels that he is not completely satisfied with himself, and there is no way for the individual to clearly recognize the positive and negative aspects of his personality other than dealing with others and observing their reactions. And taking into account their comments and advice, and receiving them objectively and without sensitivity so that he can benefit from them in developing his personality, getting rid of the negatives in it and gaining the positives... The reality is that whoever wants his personality to improve, let him take all situations and experiences in dealing with others as opportunities to understand and reform himself, for others They see my “self” more clearly than I see my “me.”

Human defects can be divided into physical defects, personality defects, or a combination of these and those.

Examples of physical defects include a young man of short stature who feels dissatisfied with himself, a young woman who does not have the appropriate amount of physical beauty, difficulty pronouncing some letters, stuttering in speech, etc.

As well as any physical disability.

Examples of personality defects include: nervousness and quick anger, hesitation and poor decision-making ability, rushing to understand things to the point of recklessness, extreme emotionality, excessive sensitivity, exaggerated attention to minute details, stubbornness, imposing one’s opinion, and a love of domineering. And control...or passivity and failure to express personal opinions, or weak self-confidence and acceptance of opinions of the other without the slightest thought, or excessive shyness, or introversion and difficulty dealing with others, or extreme slowness in a way that causes boredom, or lack of expression of emotional feelings, or indifference and weakness of sense of responsibility...and other personal qualities.

If we consider the previous examples, we will notice that there are adjectives

A fixed personality that cannot be changed, such as facial features and height. Etc., and there are qualities that can be developed, modified, or changed, such as shyness, introversion, nervousness, haste, etc., and whether one or the other, the person will not be able to deal with them positively unless he first accepts himself as he is, and then the processes of development and improvement can begin with training. Personal self, and insisting on change for the better.

Accept yourself:

We have made it clear that whoever does not accept himself as he is is not able to accept “the other” as he (she) is, as rejection of the self is rejection of the other and thus a constant conflict with him (her), and thus endless marital problems if we apply this truth to marital life.

If every person contemplates himself, he will find something that he does not like, or perhaps he will find something that he hates. He may react to that negatively and hate his entire self, ignoring the qualities in it that deserve satisfaction, attention, and development. His focus on his faults may increase until he rejects himself and may envy others for qualities that they have that he does not have. Although there are good qualities in him, but they do not... This is the negative reaction to what the individual sees as flaws in him

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The positive reaction to what the individual considers to be faults is to accept oneself with its faults as well as its advantages, and to try to adapt to some fixed characteristics (such as short stature), and to try to achieve self-actualization in various areas of life. When an individual accomplishes work, creates something, or makes a contribution that benefits others. He will feel a state of happiness and self-satisfaction, and then he will have a firm certainty that the true value of a person is not in his shape or stature, but in his distinct inner being, and little by little the individual will reconcile with himself, deriving his satisfaction and psychological balance from moral human values ​​that are higher than mere physical characteristics. .

Before getting engaged - then - the individual should understand his own shortcomings and try to correct them as much as possible, so that he can easily achieve adaptation to a life partner who is different in character and has his own shortcomings along with his advantages. Whoever does not try to understand his personal shortcomings and recognize his own weaknesses and confront them positively is not... He is able to understand that others have faults like his own, and that he must accept others as they are, with all their faults, without criticizing them for them. Rather, he helps them overcome them by providing a climate of love, friendship, understanding and subjectivity.

Before getting engaged - then - know your faults, and accept yourself so that you can develop it for the better. Self-acceptance is the beginning of your development, but whoever rejects it or is hostile to it may lose even the beautiful qualities that it possesses

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